Early card, Robin Williams and groceries

Whew ran out of room on that title rofl

Got an early birthday card from my Marine that made me laugh. It was a high-tech birthday card lol. He pointed out my age (of course) and how much computers have changed over my lifetime. Then he pointed out that at least I'm not eleventy one. Ok so my son is as much of a fantasy geek as I am. Nice Hobbit/LoTR reference :)

Justin was listening to some Robin Williams stand-up comedy. I was laughing so hard I about peed myself. I'll have to post a link to a YouTube version later.

We went grocery shopping today. We got a letter that our food stamp benefits end tomorrow and I was afraid that we wouldn't get to use the benefits still on the card. Even without paying tax everything added up quickly. But I think there's only a couple of things left and I got 2 lbs of fish, chicken, turkey and sirloin.

We're considering trading in the Honda, though I'm not crazy about a car payment. The Honda has a cracked head and is overheating. Not to mention the front passenger window won't roll down and the front passenger bumper needs to be replaced. So does the side mirror. Right now duct tape is holding the mirror on... Something to think about.

It's finally Friday

The local country station actually has a song they play on Friday mornings, that says something about Friday being here at last.  I haven't listened to that station in a long time, so I don't remember the words...

Food, water and exercise on plan today.  Walked outside, though the wind made it more of a workout than normal.  I swear, even at over 200 lbs it felt like the wind was going to blow me away or at least blow me over.

Short post tonight, talking to a dear friend on the MUD.  Then I think it's about bedtime.  I need to actually follow through on giving away some of my old clothes.  My goal is to declutter my bedroom, it's gotten to be a pit.  I need to do the kids' room too, get rid of the clothes that are too small for the duckie boy and just weed out some of the clothes the kittie girl has so we can actually fit everything in her drawers.  I guess I'll be giving away girl clothes on Freecycle.  I've got baby girl clothes to get rid of too.  The boy's clothes will go to my sister come Monday.  I think I have a busy weekend ahead of me.  K-Mart is having a sale, 20% off clothes in store with a coupon.  Time to get a few pairs of pants and shorts for the duckie boy.

I'm starving tonight.  I'm thinking tomorrow I email Allan, I'm definitely in for Phase 6, I just need to figure out what to do if they actually have bikes on the exercise plan.  Maybe I can pay for time at the local gym, I just don't really want a membership, but I think I can pay like $6 for a session, so an occasional bike ride would be okay on one of the stationary bikes.  I know I won't be happy with the meal plan, but the weight will come off, and that's my final goal.  I've got at least 60 more lbs to lose, probably closer to 70.  At least my weight continues to go in the right direction, 2 lbs a week. 

Laterness & g'night.

You call me strong, You call me weak

But still your secrets I will keep. - definitely a 3 Doors Down/Kryptonite kinda day.

I was up late last night talking to my Marine. No mom likes seeing her kids in pain... I just wish I could find a store like Ollivander's for a magic wand. Unfortunately I don't even have any suggestions, all I could do was listen...

Then this morning I tossed the cat inside the apartment before getting the kids in the car. I had to go back for Pull-Ups but couldn't get back inside. I locked my keys inside the house - car keys too. Luckily, I had my phone so I called Justin's grandparents and got a ride to get the kids where they had to go and me to work. Justin and I will have to play musical vehicles tonight to get the truck to the shop and the kittie girl to t-ball but we'll be fine.

So far food is going okay. At least my lunch was in the car when I pulled my brilliant trick. I had to get a diet soda to calm down earlier but am about half through my gallon of water too. I so want a cigarette though. I forgot how I turn to them when I'm stressed :( I'm going to have to go down and walk on the treadmill at lunch just to work some of this off.

We just found out about 2 others on this floor who have given their notice. Things have gone downhill since the merger. At least two departments still don't know if they have a job.

I was in the middle of applying for a couple of copywriting jobs when the Marine called. It didn't get done so I'll have to try again tonight. I saw a bunch to apply for.

I lose... this time lol

I've been having a contest with someone at work to see who gets to give their notice first.  He won, but only because I haven't been pushing the writing as much and he got a job with the city.  Oh well, his last day is next Friday.  I'm kinda sad because that's one less person I can talk to at work... I can't talk much to the gripe girls, and another person is a friend but I don't see eye to eye with her on a lot of things.

I get finance articles sent to my email inbox from a blog called 'The Simple Dollar.'  In a recent article, Trent (the blog's author) talks about how great things never come easily.  He's referring to more than getting out of debt and having your finances stable.  He talks of his piano lessons and saving for the dream home he and his wife want.  Weight loss is another thing that doesn't come easily.  It's worth it, just like getting out of debt is worth it.  We just need to learn patience and that it's not going to happen overnight.  Every choice is a step toward where we are going.  If we make the healthy choice, we travel toward health.  If we make the thrifty choice, we head toward being debt free.

My goal is to travel to being healthy and active.  I have another goal of being debt free, with stable finances.  I'd also like a house with a big enough yard to have a garden and grow my own produce.  So I have to work toward what I want, no matter what other choices are there.

Today, I made the choices to work toward health.  I drank enough water, I ate on plan.

Tomorrow, I'll make the same type of choices.  I'm also working toward the financial goals.  Tonight, I'm looking at writing jobs, copywriting is my choice.  I'd love to write a fiction book or two, but I know I need practice.  The one short story I sent to a magazine was rejected.  I need to rewrite the story, but after 4 years I don't have the saved file.  It's on my other laptop.  The one with a dead battery and no charger.  I will rewrite the story this weekend.

Laterness & g'night.

Welcome to the Jungle

The boy wasn't exactly happy about being at daycare today, but he didn't start crying tonight until he saw me.  Then he was all cuddly and telling me he missed me.  Aww, melt my heart why don't you?

Food on plan.  Water was a bit light, only 128 oz instead of the higher amount I've been getting, but since my goal is only 126 oz, I'm fine there.  The strength exercises are done as well.

I was wrong about the amount of our tax return.  I must have picked up a bit of Justin's dyslexia last night.  I don't understand how I would have made such a mistake, but it'll work out.  At least the amount is enough that we can get the vehicles fixed and have a bit put aside still.  And it wasn't enough to affect any help from the state.  Which is good, because I ended up with a daycare that's more expensive than the others I had called.  I should have asked before I just chose one, but I didn't.  Stupid mistake, but the boy likes it, or at least says he does. 

I just called and it appears that our paperwork has been completed.  It listed my food stamp amount at least.  I tried checking on daycare, and all it did is ask me to enter a new PIN.  I'll check it in the morning when I drop the boy off.  I have mixed feelings about getting help for stuff like this, but that's what it's there for.  I was honest about everything, including the savings we had put aside, so it's not like I lied to get financial help.  I think I just feel guilty because I know there are others that are more deserving.  I have the ability to make more money, as evidenced by the writing I did earlier tonight and the additional article due in 3 days that I'm going to work on tomorrow.  Of course, I only made about $50 for the month of April, so it's not like I go all out.  It's hard when I come home exhausted by work.

I still need to get lunch ready for tomorrow, but I guess I'll do that in the morning since my alarm will go off in 7 hours.

Laterness & g'night.

Another step toward the goal

First, food and exercise on plan.  Water... well I only count water toward the fluids I'm supposed to be drinking, and I've started going over by about 32 oz every day.  I'm just finishing my water earlier and drinking more overall.  It's all good :)  I never thought I'd be the type to drink more than a gallon of water a day.  100 oz was my limit for about 10 years.

Second, the icky news.  Justin looked like someone had hit him in the face a few times when he got home.  His face was still broken out from the chemicals at the new job.  He's not sure where they're going to put him tomorrow, but we're hoping for the best.  I'm more worried about a severe allergic reaction.  As long as they keep watching him, he should get through it. 

Third, some really good news.  Our tax return arrived today and was promptly deposited in the bank where it joined the rest of our moving fund.  Hopefully we'll have enough to move by the end of May.  I'm planning on putting every cent we can toward the moving fund now that Justin's working.  We got about $1k more than we expected, which is a great thing.

Fourth, the boy seemed to like daycare until the end where everyone else was gone except him and the infant caretaker who he didn't know, and she was vacuuming (he's afraid of the vacuum).  He was very upset when I picked him up.  But he said he had fun today, so... we see how he reacts when I drop him off tomorrow. 

Fifth, it's bedtime.  I've made some big strides over the last few days, and need my sleep to keep at the changes I need to be making.  I'm done with the poor me attitude.  For 20 years, I've gone the path of least resistance and it's put me in a place I'm unhappy with.  So it's time for me to make the choices I should have been making all along.

One of these days I need to find the time to color my hair again.  LOL

Laterness & g'night.

Come on and wade way out in the water

With me we're drowning on dry land

Its amazing how much better things look after a good walk/jog. It'll work out. They know Justin can't help being allergic to the chemicals. They'll find him something else to do and we'll be able to pay daycare and food out of his income. It'll be more expensive once the kittie girl goes in full time too but we'll get through it. I just hope his work fills out the DHS paperwork soon. That'll help me sort out the daycare expense. Until then, I'll talk to the director to make a payment arrangement.

Day 121

Now I know why I was worried about jinxing the job... I'm trying not to stress about it - Justin had an allergic reaction to the chemicals he's working with so they're looking at finding another area for him to work in...

And his new job still hasn't filled out the paperwork for DHS so we have to pay in full for daycare until the paperwork is in and processed. I need to find out how much costs until everything is processed.

Just when it seems things might actually get better something happens. We'll get through it but I'm stressing over everything. Stressing over it will just make me sick. I need to stop. As long as Justin brings home at least $200 a week after child support we'll be okay.

Easter

I have a post for my other blog almost all written in my head.  Why? Because of something said at church today.  Go figure since I try not to be preachy on that blog.  This one, I write what I want. 

I'm kinda bored tonight, so I'm going to bed early.  I think it's just that I'm antsy for the changes going on tomorrow.  It'll work out, I just need to figure everything out.  I think I'm going to start leaving work at exactly 5:30 since they want me there until 'late,' whatever that means.  Since I'm going in earlier, it should all work out.  Of course with an hour lunch, I may end up not wanting to go back to work.  hehe  I'm just not all that into TV sometimes other than certain shows, so it's hard to entertain myself. 

Anyway, everything on plan today, and I'm down 1.8 lbs, though I reported a 2 lb loss to Allan because of rounding.  It'd be nice if I could get below 200 lbs by my 40th birthday, but I don't see it happening.  I turn 40 in a week and a half.  I doubt very much that I could do 7 lbs in that time.

Think I'm just gonna go to bed and stop stressing over things.  Tomorrow is t-ball practice, and an article that absolutely needs to be written.  I can do it in an hour, if I sit at the desktop, put on headphones and type.  I'd probably end up with 1500 words at that point.  I'm thinking that's what I need to do, as I only have 1 day and 23 hours left to write the stupid thing.  I definitely procrastinate too much.  Tomorrow after t-ball practice it is.  Laterness & g'night.

Let My People Go

ABC is has the Moses (rather the Ten Commandments) movie on with Charlton Heston.  I don't normally watch it, but Justin turned it on tonight, so I'm half paying attention.  They really did take creative license with the story, but the story is there. 

We had an Easter Egg hunt at the church.  We brought my step-son.  The kids enjoyed it, and my stepson gave the younger kids some of the candy he got since he ended up with a lot more than they did.  I had them thank him, and I made a point of thanking him.  Justin's ex was there too with her other kids, but we didn't really talk to her.  She came over and talked to me a bit, but just to ask where Justin was when he had gone to get something warmer to wear.  It was cold.  I think the temperature was only in the low 60's, and the north wind had it feeling colder.

I did my grocery shopping for the week.  I know it's possible that the menu is going to change again on Friday/Saturday, but I did the shopping anyway since Allan hadn't mentioned new menus for anyone other than the 4 (well 3 and him) that are trying the Phase 6 menus.  I also got plenty of exercise, though today is supposed to be a day of rest.  I'll walk tomorrow too, I feel like Tuesdays and Thursdays are enough of a day of rest with just the strength exercises.

I'm kinda looking forward to this week, I'm going to start having close to an hour at lunch.  That'll let me exercise and eat without having to eat and work.  I'm going in earlier since I'm bringing the kittie girl to school.  It's silly to bring her to school then go back home before dropping the duckie boy at daycare.  I figure I'll make lunches for Justin and myself the night before, and have my coffee ready to go.  The coffee is going to be needed.  I may end up having to get up earlier as well so I can take a shower and still get everyone ready on time.

The extra time at lunch will mean I can exercise more to help me deal with the stress.  Even if my boss talks to me as if I were 2 like she did on Friday, I can exercise longer than 20 minutes and feel better afterward.

LOL I went into the bathroom to take out my contacts, and Moses/The Ten Commandments wasn't on any more.  He turned on Sherlock Holmes with Robert Downey, Jr.

I'm thinking it's about bedtime.  I've caught up on everything that I need to do tonight.  Other than the pile of coupons that's getting smaller.  I'm making progress on that too.  Laterness & g'night.

I'm No Body from Nowhere

So, the kittie girl kept wanting to go outside with Justin learning to throw and catch a softball for t-ball.  It's nice that she likes t-ball so much that she's wanting to go outside instead of sitting in front of the TV.  I know that once we get to FL, my sister will encourage her to keep at the softball.  Me, my hand-eye coordination sucks.  But I'm thinking going back into Tae Kwon Do and maybe making sure I do - uh my mind went blank, the bike class at the gym.

Got my walk in, and it's past my bedtime.  I was just caught up in watching The Day After Tomorrow.

So now, I sleep.  Laterness & g'night.

Oh down in Mexico

I need a vacation. I'm taking things the wrong way today and have wanted to cry more than once. My boss is talking down to me today but of course I can't say anything. She's in a mood.

I need to change how I'm writing to encourage me to write more. If I change computers it'll be easier and less distracting. My goal? At least another $60 by the 5th. I can do more so I want to try...

Climbing through the doggie door

My sister caught my 1 year old nephew crawling out through the doggie door. He saw the dog do it so decided to try for himself.

Today I'm wishing I could afford to stay home with the munchkins. If I could get my writing to take off faster itd help. I have a lot of work to put in first is all. I've still gotta get another $40 of work done in textbroker so I can cover recurring bills next month. Nothing major - Rhapsody for the MP3 players, hosting for my domains.. Things like that.

Water is a bit late today but I'm on my last 16 oz.

Day 116 - Accomplishing Much

Let's see, definitely a full day here.  Food on plan. Exercise - I went to the mall and walked around 1.75 times or so pushing a stroller (more than a mile - each lap is 0.6 mi) then I went the other 1.25 times round I walked with the duckie boy.  He got really slow at the end, but he wanted to walk.  Water got done right as well, though I ended up sharing with the duckie boy.

Signed up for a daycare.  Signed up for daycare help from DHS.  Signed up for food stamps as well.  We qualify for it all, so we'll take the help.  We don't have it as bad as others, but I'm not going to turn down any help.  The kittie girl had, t-ball practice tonight.  She seemed to like it so that's a good thing.

Justin will be making more than we originally thought as well.  Another nice thing.  It's all going to start working out.

Anyway, gonna get some sleep.  I'm exhausted after everything.  Laterness & g'night.

Day 115 - More Random Thoughts

Half watching Criminal Minds then going to bed.  Tomorrow I get to stay home with the duckie boy and try to find a daycare for him starting Monday.  It'll mean a lot of separation anxiety.  My duckie boy isn't going to know what to do with himself.  Neither is Justin. 

Phase 6 looks interesting with the liquid part.  I may wait until everything is finalized before I actually decide that I'm going to drop out :P

I'm hungry, not a bad thing. 

Food and water on plan.  Strength training is about to happen (I know it's late).  Tomorrow will be a walk at the mall because... Justin always takes the duckie boy for a walk at the mall.

Everything is going so well for us, we are blessed.  I saw a segment on the news about Food4Kids.  It makes me sad that some need so much...

Anyway, laterness & g'night.

Focus Makes Me Fabulous

I do listen to FlyLady some. I'm going to have to get in the habit of doing it more often starting with a 'launch pad' and setting out clothes the night before. I think this week I'll start with laying clothes out. I'm going to be getting the kids ready on my own and I haven't done it a lot so I need to make it easier on myself.

I've been doing some thinking about the situation we've been in since Justin ... I started to say since he was laid off but it honestly started before that... My plan is to start using FlyLady in more than getting me out of the house on time. I've got some thinking to do on the best way to increase my income and 'fix' our finances.

Be still and know he is God

After the weepy morning, some good news came our way. At the risk of jinxing it, Justin was offered a job today. He goes for orientation Wednesday and starts Monday.

So Wednesday I stay home from work. Its hard to get a spot in daycare last minute. We'll apply for daycare help until he gets his first check. The duckie boy isn't going to know what to do without daddy around. Hopefully he'll learn a few things - like eating regular food. Most daycares won't make him hot dogs or peanut butter sandwiches.

Time for dinner. I should be back later. So far on plan.

Day 114 - What we could be...

Probably not going to post much today... or I might post a lot.  I haven't figured it out yet.  I'm weepy and just sad today.  I don't want to whine about what I should have changed long ago.  So instead, I'm trying to focus on today and staying calm and drama free.

Day 113 - Random Thoughts

So looking at the information for Phase 6, I may not be able to stay in the challenge.  I don't have a bike.  I can't afford to buy a bike unless something drastic happens.  If I can't follow the plan, then what?  He says that he wants everyone to stick to the plan exactly.  Uhh, I guess I'll just have to keep at what I'm doing and I'll lose.  I'll increase my exercise.  I'd love to start rollerblading more often.  I'd love to start back in Tae Kwon Do.  It'll all depend on what's going on, and where I'm living.  If I can't stay in the challenge for Phase 6, I'll be disappointed, but that's just how life goes sometimes.

This week will be interesting.  I didn't have enough cash on me to buy potatoes, so any of the days with potatoes, I'll just have to skip that part of the plan.  That'll mean a lot less calories than is actually planned.  Oh well.  I can't get potatoes with WIC, so do I dip into the moving fund more? Other thoughts to ponder.  I get paid on Friday.

I missed lunch because I didn't have what I needed, so I ate breakfast and dinner.  I'm hungry, but it's after 9 pm, I don't want to eat this late.

I'm weepy.  Though we have money if we need it, I'm trying to balance it all.  We spent too much for the birthday party, and I've already dipped into the moving fund to get groceries since we spent so much with the party.  My mistake, but I wasn't thinking about how everything added up.  It's fine, I'll probably give in and get what we need with money from the moving fund and just write more to make up for it.

Speaking of writing more, I'd best get back to re-editing the article that I wrote last night.  The customer requested that I make it read a bit more smoothly.  Hmm Kinda like today's post, huh?

Laterness & g'night.

Hmm

Thought I posted last night. I remember posting somewhere... maybe to SparkPeople?  Absolutely no clue lol.

The party went well, I had some kids show up that didn't RSVP, and the kittie girl had fun. 

I'm tired today and want to take a nap.  Thinking I'm going to sleep and skip church.  I'll listen to a sermon online later.  Gonna eat and then take a nap since yesterday took more out of me than out of the kids.

Drama & Parties

I sent out invitations for kittie girl's birthday party on Tuesday, and the party is tomorrow afternoon.  Of course, I went for cheap at the park, so I'm hoping the weather cooperates. I'm a bit overwhelmed, because I'm not entirely sure what I'm supposed to have other than cake and ice cream. Hoping to keep everything under $20. To keep it that low, I'll have to make the cake. It's all good. I think maybe a butterfly cake again this year :) I bought the cake pan last year. At least everything is at the park and the forecast is sunny and 70 with the winds only a breezy 15 mph instead of the 40+ mph from today.

I'm tired from the mess at work today. I need a new job so bad I can taste it. I'm still thinking about getting a booth at the farmer's market that starts on the 7th. It's $20 for the year and then $5 or 5% for the weekly booth fee.

It's bedtime.  Laterness & g'night.

Make the most of your own journey

Forgot to post yesterday. It was a long day at work then even more stuff to do at home. Planning the kittie girl's birthday party for tomorrow and I've only gotten 1 RSVP. Now I'm worried about the weather tho its supposed to be nice tomorrow, its nasty today. Hopefully the weather forecast is right and everything clears up in time for the party.

Its been one or those days today at work and its not much better with the moms group I post to on SparkPeople. I just want to hibernate.

Food is on plan, though I didn't exercise at lunch and I'm dreading doing it after work. I'll get through it. Maybe at the mall...

It's a Day

I don't know what I did earlier, the long post I typed up didn't go through, but my shorter posts did.  Here it is:

So I was thinking today that I might want to actually participate in the farmer's market that starts next month.  But do I have the time? Do I have the money for a booth? I know I don't have a tent or tables, but an EZUp tent is $100 if I can find it at Walmart.  I have some candle supplies but I would need to pay for more scents and business/liability insurance.


Since Justin isn't working right now, maybe I should have him research something he can do...


Food on plan.  I was kinda glad to see the other menus back - they're easier with my 2 kids, tho I'll have to find another place to buy fat free ice cream.  Walmart only has fat free fudge brownie. :(

Ok, now for tonight's update, when typing this, I just remembered someone was selling her candle business.  Hmm, I can't pay cash... something to think about.

Thinking its time to sleep once Justin gets home.  I'm gonna start going through coupons again.  Laterness & g'night.

LOL

So the second post made it first. Oops

Hmm

So the message isn't going through. Interesting.

Spoke to Justin. He's going to look into doing domething for the farmers market. I may do soaps and candles - just start out small. We'll see what we decide but the steps are in motion and something if afoot. LOL

Day 108 - Extreme Couponing

So I managed to catch the Extreme Couponing show on TLC tonight.  When I told Justin to change it to that channel, he asked if they have a show about me.  Uhh no, I don't even come close to buying all of that for what they pay for it.  He watched the first clip and agreed that I don't do quite that extreme.  I'm thinking I might need to try to work toward it... I do have the knowledge, I just need to find the energy.  I did subscribe to the local paper today so I have coupons coming in at least.  I do have some issue with what one person is doing on the show.  One of the worst things is to be a shelf clearer, taking everything off the shelf for one item.

Food on plan today, water as well.  I haven't done the strength exercises, and I need to get some writing done... so I guess I'm going to cut this short tonight.  I'm putting pressure on myself to see if I can start making a living out of writing.  That's been my goal for years, writing and designing for a living, I've just put it off because I don't feel worthy.  I am though, I just need to remember that.

Laterness & g'night.

Day 107

Not really up for a title tonight.  I'm just... sad.  Things aren't bad here, I just read about cajunmama's grandmother dying, and it brought back memories of my own grammie dying - in 2008, just before I had my youngest.  In a way, with my grandmother dying at 87, it was a bit of a blessing because her Alzheimer's had gotten so bad that she was bedridden.  And tonight, I saw a picture of my uncle on Facebook.  He died in 2006 when checking out the family's sugaring cabin that July.  That made me a bit sad too.  My cousin is naming his son-to-be after his dad. 

So all that is going through my mind tonight.  Justin turned on Avatar tonight, it's on HBO.  I'm going to watch it and then turn off the TV so I can get some writing done before I go to bed.  It's more important that I focus on my writing than anything else at this point.  My plan is to start earning a living from copywriting.  This means I have to actually stop with the procrastination, and get my site up.  I did get my missing fonts on my computer last night.  Free fonts I had downloaded at one point, but with changing computers a couple of times, they went away.  I really do need to get Windows reinstalled on the other computer so I can access the pictures that I took years ago. There's a really cool one of an Eagle that I want on my personal website.  My Marine took that picture at the Kansas City zoo.

Food, on plan, though I'm not entirely crazy about low carb meals.  Water, more than enough.  Exercise happened, though I will say it's harder to run outside than on a treadmill.

All in all, a productive day.  Now to get the next part of my day done.  Laterness & g'night.

Day 106 - Weigh In Results

So today's weigh in, I'm down 4.4 lbs, though Allan's information will only say 4 lbs because of rounding.  It's all good. 

I'm tired tonight.  I went for a long walk tonight.  My leg muscles were twitching for a good 5 minutes after I sat down.  It's been awhile since I pushed myself that much, and it felt good. 

I also noticed tonight, I don't always think about how much weight I've lost until I put on clothes that I used to wear that were tight on me.  Tonight, I'm wearing lounging pants that I used to wear.  They're really baggy on me and hanging on the floor.  It's so funny since they were short when I wore them when I was heavier. 

Food on plan, got my water, and got my exercise for the day.  I'm so looking forward to sleeping as soon as I get my writing done.  I wanted a nap this afternoon, but didn't get it.  Instead, I went to Walmart and bought myself a pair of sandals for the week and a slip & camisole to wear under one of my skirts and blouses this week when the boss is in town.  Gonna try to get my writing done.  Laterness & g'night.

Day 105 (still though it's almost midnight)

So, I did a lot of thinking, and I took a bath.  It's not all that bad.  We have plenty to get us through until I get paid again.  Plus, I'll be getting paid weekly starting the first Friday in May, and my insurance copay is going to go down.  It'll all be alright.  Justin has applied for 3 jobs since Thursday.  It'll all work out.  And no more stress and worry over money the first week of the month.  I might even be able to add to my savings with the writing.  We'll be getting our income taxes back soon.  It'll all work out.  I also won't go to that dark place I seem to go around the 7th of the month because we've scrambled to give them as much as we can.

I wish I had gone for a walk, but at least I didn't binge.  I did have a cigarette though, and a long hot bath. 

I got a humidifier for the duckie boy, but it didn't seem to help tonight.  Maybe the humidifier and the cough medicine or allergy medicine.  It's after midnight, I need to get some sleep.  Laterness & g'night.

And so it goes

We were getting further and further behind with the papers we were delivering.  Well, actually some months we were starting to catch up and other months weren't as good because of sales.  So today, they asked Justin to pay in full by tomorrow.  The money order we gave them Thursday was all he had.  I refuse to pay more of the savings we are planning on using to move.  So, they fired him.  I'm not surprised.  We were planning on quitting the route anyway because it seemed like some months we got further behind and other months we were able to pay them more. 

It's all good, we're in God's hands.  We have to be because I can't pay child support on my income on top of paying all of the bills.  Justin will get another job around town.  He wants to go back to the other newspaper, but I don't really want him to.  Not a discussion to have while his son is here.  (please excuse me if I'm missing an 'n' here or there, my keyboard needs a can of compressed air methinks.  I'm trying to backspace when I see I've missed one, but I'm far from perfect).

That said, if the weight I saw this morning holds for tomorrow, I'll be a very happy camper.  211.2  Very nice.

I need to run to Walmart for a few groceries while Justin makes dinner.  I may be back later.  At least I'm past the binging that I wanted to do earlier (I didn't, but I wanted to).

She ran calling wildfire

Food was on plan today.  Exercise as well.  Fluids go without saying with the gallon of water on my desk. 

No soda, I made a cup of tea.  Stress through the roof, both my work related and worrying about my Marine. The grandstanding idiots inside the beltway need to grow up.  Both are at fault, both need to lose their income and pensions.

Enough about that.  I need to figure out what I have for decent clothes that fit.  My boss's boss is coming from Cinci this week and all the smaller clothes I pulled out are jeans and t-shirts.  I'll have to go through my clothes and maybe haunt the clearance rack at Ross.

I'm tired ad heading to bed early.  Laterness & g'night.

Bring on the rain

Not the song... OK is having some real problems with drought. We've got wildfires and really need rain. It sprinkled and there are thunderstorms in the forecast. I just hope the lightning doesn't start more fires. The air was filled with smoke this morning.

I've been doing some thinking about changes I can make to be closer to the plan. I do follow it almost exact but I have creamer in my coffee. I think once this bottle is done, I'll start drinking my coffee black again. I'm just going to want a cigarette when drinking it that way. LOL that's how I drank my coffee when I smoked, black & sweet. It'll be okay.

For the rest I haven't had time to email about substitutions and don't have money to pick up anything for tomorrow. I'm going to have to use one of the old menus I think. I may be able to get some egg beaters - I have a coupon for a free carton. I don't have cheese but I should have everything else for one of the low carb menus from the old menu plan.

It'll all work out. I do appreciate the work that goes into the menus but we really need to repeat them more often because its getting so expensive to buy stuff for just one meal.

Day 102

No catchy title today. I'm just tired and a bit sick of seeing that I must not be following the plan because the numbers say I should be losing more than I am. What the eff ever. With a thyroid problem I'm doing the best I can. I've been on plan all day every day other than the cake several weeks ago. Its been hard, especially watching the people at work during all of the pot lucks. Not to mention the meals out sitting next to someone eating fries and fried fish or a plate of nachos and ordering sashimi or salmon. I'm not dropping out of the challenge only because I'm afraid I'll stop losing entirely if I do.

I'm also having trouble with food spoiling and it costing too much money with the menus changing so often. I need to find acceptable substitutions. Especially since money is so tight and I can't just go use half a banana for a meal. The rest will go bad. And a specific bread for day 8?? Then what do I do with the rest of the loaf when the menu changes again?? Argh.

I need to stop looking at the menus before I get very frustrated. I'll have to email about substitutions.

Day 101 - When the sun goes down

Little Kenny Chesney and Uncle Cracker this morning. I found some drink mix I wanted to try - lime margarita flavor. I had a big fight with Justin this morning. It seems to be a regular occurence the first week of the month - when we're doing the paperwork for the Oklahoman. He's threatening to quit and sign up for food stamps and try to get back on with the Enid paper. Its very tempting to tell him go for it. We're not making enough to make it worth our while. And now Its 5 O'clock Somewhere is playing.

We're supposed to have a supplier take us to lunch. It'll be interesting. I'm on day 6 of the 3rd set of menus (the one before the low carb week) and its got a lot of food. The canteloupe I bought is good. And Justin just texted me that the duckie boy likes Kashi cereal.

I also got a call from the kittie girl's school. She's supposed to be doing speech therapy and my meeting is at 11:30. Oops.

Day 100 - Bored Yet?

I think I'm going to be busy over the next few days.  I released the article I took last night, as they wanted me to write in British English and I didn't notice when I took the article.  I am only confident writing in British English when I know I'll have an editor looking over my article and editing for any incorrect phrasing.  I'll look at the articles again after we get the paperwork done for the Oklahoman.  I have one article that was sent back to me to change, but the change is general.  I'll do what I can and if they still reject it, I'll email Textbroker to see if they can get clarification that I can't.  It's all good, I'm transferring some money from my savings account to cover the rest of what I need to pay, but I made enough with this to pay most of my bills, including my domain renewal for my main business website that I actually need to redesign lol.

Decided that since I'm kinda just watching the kids before I rewrite that article, I'm gonna update both of my blogs.  I have a third one that is a private journal that isn't public.  Just something I don't want Justin reading because it covers some of the crap that goes through my head when things are rough between him and I.  Since doubts are normal for anyone, then I see no reason to let him read it, I just need to get it off my chest sometimes, and writing it on paper leaves it open for the possibility that he find it sometime.  Of course, I could always just burn it after writing, but sometimes I like to go back and read how far I've come.

The kittie girl has a birthday this weekend and wants to have a party with her whole class.  I'm trying to figure out how to balance what she wants with what we can afford.  I changed my mind about going to the bowling alley or skating rink.  It costs too much.  At least $8 per person, and there are 20 in her class.  We can't invite part of the class but not all of the class.  So.. I'm going to keep checking for the weather forecast, and see if I can reserve a picnic area in the park next weekend (after her birthday). 

It took me so long to do everything, I kept getting distracted from blogging, so its now 11 pm.  oops.  Laterness & g'nite.

Day 99 - Almost 100 Days

LOL, so my post title isn't original tonight.

I was very frustrated when I weighed in today.  On Wednesday, my weight was at 214 even.  Today, my weight was at 215.4.  I've followed the plan as well as I can, but apparently I'm doing something wrong somewhere.  I was ready to give up, but I'm down almost 30 lbs, so I just need to keep at it.

I've got some writing due in a bit over an hour, so I've gotta get going, just a quick check in today.  I'm unhappy, but sticking with the plan.  I'm not sure about the low carb options.  We'll see what they come out with when it happens.  Until then, I think it's going to be the spaghetti day on the original meal plan on Friday.  I'll have to make pancakes Thursday night, but I'm wearing clothes I haven't worn since 2003, so this is working.

Laterness & g'night.

Day 98 - Bright and Early

So the little one was up at midnight coughing.  He ended up gagging himself and throwing up all over himself and me.  I think we're going to call the doctor's office come Monday.  We need to figure out what's going on with him.  The coughing has good nights and bad nights. 

We have money for gas and food at least, a friend of mine doesn't even have that.  She's been weighing on my heart lately.  I know she's down because money is so tight for her.  It's not that tight for us.  We'll pay the Oklahoman what we can afford to pay them and still have money for ourselves.  We're not doing without, we'll catch up as quickly as we can, and we're not dipping into our savings any more.  It means money is tight while we try to pay everything on my income, but it could be much worse.  And we pay for our gas out of the money from the paper, because most of our gas expenses are from him delivering papers.  The paper has to cover gas and child support or it's not worth it.

Thinking about going to a Medieval Fair this weekend.  It's free admission and it'd get the kids out of the house.  I think they'd like it.

New menus

I found out two things with tonight's menus.

1. it's hard to eat KFC anything without wanting a biscuit too. 
2. KFC no longer sits well in my stomach.  I feel really sick and I've got heartburn.

Hopefully I feel better in the morning. 

The walk happened as it was supposed to today.  I didn't get another walk in the afternoon, but I still got over 30 minutes of movement.  As soon as Justin gets out of the bathroom, I will take out my contacts.  I'm thinking I'll be in bed by 10:30 at the latest. 

The duckie boy decided tonight that he wanted to go in his own bed before he fell asleep.  I told him if he starts sleeping in his own bed, I"ll get him a big bed like his sister has.  So far he's laying there, so we'll see what happens.  I'm gonna start writing, hopefully get this article done before bedtime.

Laterness & g'night.

Day 97 - she was queen for about an hour

Puddle of Mudd this morning - She Hates Me.

I forgot, its going to be a hard day. The supervisor bought pizza for everyone. Of course pizza isn't on the plan, especially not meat pizza. Lunch today is avacado, mozzarella cheese, and tomato. I'm supposed to do olive oil too but I forgot to put it on my salad. Oops.

Its nice and sunny today. I went for a walk outside this morning for break (which I don't normally take). This afternoon, I'll do it again. I'll walk on the treadmill at 12:30.

The girls have an elaborate April Fools joke set up for one of the guys that's coming from Cincinnati today. Should be interesting to see if he falls for it.

No pizza for me. KFC or Wendy's tonight. The chicken strips sound yummy but we'll see how I feel tonight. Time to eat so I can go walk. I'm gonna need all the self control I can muster the pizza smells yummy. Bah humbug!

Morning, or something like it

Last night, I didn't get much sleep.  My 2 year old decided he didn't want to sleep.  I was up off and on past 3 am.  Not fun.  I think the tea experiment is out for today.  Coffee has more caffeine.  Or at least coffee affects me like it has more caffeine.

I've got an article due tonight.  Well not really due tonight, but I want to get it done tonight.  I may have a problem getting all of the money I need by this weekend.  I've got 2 articles that haven't been approved yet, and I suspect this one won't be approved in time either.  I may have to transfer money from my savings to PayPal.  That's fine, I'll make up for it later this month.  I'm only short about $25.

I'd best get ready for work, though I'd love to go back to bed.  It's going to be one of those days.  Off to make the coffee.